Age was Not a Question
by Draco-Zelda
Summary: "We were just going to talk - that was all..." Severus/Hermione. What happens when things get a bit hot at the astronomy tower?


We were just going to talk - that is all.

Snape reached out and placed his hand on Hermione, who was silently enjoying the midnight view from the astronomy tower. The dancing stars that twinkled in the sky shone brightly, but not as bright as the young girl's eyes. Severus felt a ping in his heart as Hermione turned to him.

"Severus," she whispered, noticing the pressure of his hand on hers with a nervous quiver in her voice. "I'm not graduated...we can't do this..." she insisted, though both knew these failed insisting would be to no avail for the lovers.

"And yet," the whisper of his voice left something to be desired to the young girl, the thick British accent that laced Severus' words proved to be very desirable to the young girl. Hermione blushed as she scooted slightly closer to her professor, knowing the sin but succumbing to lust nonetheless.

Severus closed the space between him and the underage girl. He knew it was wrong - a student and professor's relationship was supposed to be purely platonic. However, how could deny the love that blossomed right before his eyes?

They weren't sure who closed the link first - whether Hermione leaned in or Snape pressured his lips onto hers was to be debated. The fact of the matter was that the two felt an explosion of passion as their lips locked like a key to its hole. Hermione placed a hand on her professor's cheek as if to draw him in even more into her seducing kiss, however Severus did not need to be told twice to give tongue.

Hermione was leaned down to the stony floor as Snape eased her in, his hands becoming eager with each movement to her jailbait body. His hand grazed her curvy figure with intense attention and Hermione released a slight gasp from the newfound pleasure.

His hands found her way to the bottom of her shirt, after Severus had a grasp on it he began rolling it up, revealing her toned stomach underneath. Severus broke the kiss and stared back at his lover - her smooth brown hair dazzled in the velvet moonlight. Taking in the view Severus took a moment to gaze at her lovingly before proceeding to kiss the flesh on her stomach that was bared.

It was just when Severus made it to the two goldmines otherwise known as her chest that he felt something was wrong.

There was the sound of footsteps in the distance. Hermione didn't notice it due to the pleasure that she was receiving. It wasn't until a man in a suit with stunning eyes walked in that Severus broke the passionate make out session.

"Who the hell are you? This is my girl, get your own!" Severus cried out, glaring at the man. Who was he? Hermione's father?

"Nice day to be out at the astronomy tower, eh?" The man asked with a cocky grin, holding a pile of papers that seemed to be stapled together. There was sheer amusement on his face - like a cat playing with a mouse.

Then it suddenly clicked in for Snape. This must be Hermione's father! Talk about a bad position for Snape to be in - Severus started to think of a million excuses as he quickly climbed off the underage girl.

"Are you the girl's father?" Snape asked, his voice trembling with sheer fear as the man's grin widened. Oh Snape was in hot water now…

"We can answer those questions later, now come and take a seat." Suddenly a chair appeared in front of the two men. Severus sighed and began to sit down, groaning with anticipation.

The man passed Severus' chat logs ... chat logs that were from the Hogwarts online chat site that was set up a mere two months prior. "W-We were just talking, I swear I wasn't going to do anything." Severus pleaded desperately as if he already knew what he was convicted for.

"If you were just going to talk," the man scanned through his chat logs, stopping at page five. "Then why did you ask her 'do you want my thang in your mouth?'" He said, making a note to say the word 'thang' with a mock gangster accent despite the fact that he was painfully white.

"She said that she was nineteen!" Severus insisted, knowing very well that Hermione (who, to make note of, was no where to be seen) was fifteen. But if it kept his arse out of jail then he would go for it.

"Hm, that's rather interesting." the man scanned back to pack one of the chat logs. "Then why did this conversation happen? 'Age, sex, location?' 'Fifteen, female, Hogwarts lolz' 'lol a lil young to be on these sites, eh' 'are you weirded out by that?' 'hell no...it's hot!'"

Severus felt sweat running down his back as his breathing quickened. Hermione seemed so innocent, so pure, so . . . bait girl! That was it - this guy was the chief of police!

The professor knew what he had to do - grovel. "I'm sorry officer, I'll never do it again, never ever again!" He cried out, trying to protect himself. If this was a police investigation he was screwed.

"Well I have to ask, why would you do this?" The man retorted, ignoring Severus' assuming nature and going straight for the heart of the matter. "You're a professor - why would you ease a young girl into such things?

"I...I..." Severus knew he was completely messed over - the only thing he could do was try to say he was innocent. I mean, even though the police heard this every day, he would definitely believe him, right?

"We were just going to talk, that is it." Severus said once again, the man sighed and shook his head as if this was the fifth time he had heard this statement today. The man put the chat log on the floor and crossed his arms before taking a breath in.

"Well there is something you need to know, I'm Chris Hansen with dateline NBC and we're doing an investigation on adults who solicit children on the internet." Suddenly a camera crew popped out and stared directly at Snape, who felt a hot red blush take over his face.

Chris Hansen smirked back at him, knowing that Severus was virtually screwed. "Is there anything else you would like to say?" He asked, knowing that Severus could say nothing to make this situation better.

"I...I only hope that people understand I'm innocent." The potion master mumbled before walking back inside Hogwarts where a team of Aurors pinned him down and stated he had the right to remain silent before getting promptly shipped off to pedo-jail.

Severus Snape had dun goof'd.

The end.

A/N: This is a little bit of a retort to all the Severus/Hermione fanfics I see. Don't get me wrong - some of them are great and the writers are amazing (I've read a couple of them) but some of them just make me cringe.


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